Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away. When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known. And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Cor 13:1-13
Paul's definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13 is rooted first in Christ's example and then in his teachings. Interestingly, Paul defines love as a choice, not a feeling or sentiment. After being in the church for many years, it is amazing how very few books or sermons are written from this perspective of love. The love Paul describes does not require a miracle, laying on of hands, or any supernatural gift or divine intervention; it just requires a choice to prefer someone else over oneself. Yet, in our world today, that choice can be quite miraculous.
The underlying challenge is that this kind of love often requires us to make decisions that go against our natural inclinations. For example, choosing to forgive someone who has wronged us rather than seeking revenge or holding a grudge goes against our instinct for self-protection and justice. Similarly, loving our enemies and praying for those who persecute us, as Jesus taught, contradicts our natural desire to avoid or retaliate against those who harm us.
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs outlines human needs from the most basic physical necessities to higher-level psychological and self-fulfillment needs. At the base are physiological needs like food and shelter, followed by safety, love and belonging, esteem, and finally, self-actualization at the top. Paul’s definition of love challenges this hierarchy by suggesting that the choice to love selflessly and sacrificially can sometimes require us to prioritize others’ needs over our own basic or psychological needs.
In his letter to the Galatians, Paul describes the fruit of the Spirit, which includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Here, love is presented as a fundamental characteristic of a life led by the Spirit, implying that patience and kindness are inherent aspects of genuine love.
In Philippians 2:3-4, Paul urges believers to "do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." This echoes the call to selfless love, where the well-being of others is prioritized over personal desires. This selfless, sacrificial love challenges us to prioritize the well-being of others over our own desires and comforts.
Paul also writes in Romans 12:9-10, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves." This passage emphasizes that true love is sincere and involves a commitment to goodness and honoring others, reinforcing the idea that love is not about seeking personal gain but about genuine care and respect for others.
In Ephesians 4:2, Paul advises, "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love." This instruction highlights the necessity of patience and gentleness, qualities that are essential in enduring hardships and maintaining harmonious relationships.
Finally, in Colossians 3:12-14, Paul writes, "Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." This passage reinforces the idea that love is the binding force that unites all virtues and that it requires compassion, humility, and forgiveness.
Paul describes true love as patient, kind, humble, and selfless. It does not envy, boast, or act rudely. It forgives, rejoices in the truth, and never gives up. Jesus embodied this love, teaching his followers to love their enemies and pray for those who mistreat them (Luke 6:27-28). Jesus's love was patient and kind, culminating in his sacrifice for others (John 15:13), perfectly matching Paul’s description of true love. Paul’s teachings about love reflect exactly what Jesus taught, showing that love is the most important, selfless, and enduring virtue in our lives.
If love, as described by Paul and Jesus, were the universal value embraced by everyone, the world would be much more harmonious and caring. People would treat each other with patience, kindness, and humility. Conflicts and wars would drastically decrease because forgiveness and understanding would be prioritized over revenge, anger, and the accumulation of wealth by wicked people. In this world, that choice to prefer someone else over oneself would indeed be quite miraculous.
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